Tiger and Infidelity

Tigers are seemingly indiscriminate about mating with another tiger. The males compete for the right to mate with a female in season. But at the end, it is the female who may or may not accept any male for the purposes of mating. (As both male and female tigers have really long teeth.) The female adopts a peculiar laying down on her stomach posture for the act. If she doesn’t do this, then nothing else happens.

Human beings are little different. We can mate any time during the year. Our fast growing population can attest to that. And it seems, some people do mate all year round and with multiple partners. Even those who take on the persona of a tiger, who are constantly looking for a female in season.

Tiger Woods, it seems, was very successful in finding many mating partners. But unlike real tigers, human beings pair up for life, theoretically. There is a reason we have chosen the idea of permanent pair bonding, as it is obvious that it is not part of our natural makeup. Men want to know that the children born of their wives are really theirs. Women want a husband who will pick her out of all the other women available and who will help her raise their children. Spouses want to have someone to share their lives with. Both husband and wife want to be assured that each one is not at risk for a sexually transmitted disease. It takes a while to raise a human child – a tiger cub, not so much.

Studies have found that children who have a father around in their lives thrive and succeed more than children whose father is not in the household. What is Tiger Woods teaching his children? Parents lie? He doesn’t love their mother? Promises don’t really count?

Infidelity breaks down the one thing that is essential for any marriage, trust. If a partner cannot be trusted with something as important as marriage vows, then how can that person be trusted for even little things? When Tiger goes to his next golf tournament, will Elin trust him to avoid extra-marital activities?

Marriages can survive infidelity. There are programs that help couples. But one thing Tiger Woods and any other person caught cheating needs to do. This is, do everything the offended partner asks you. This includes calling in, and being home when you say you will be, even if there are good reasons not to be. The broken trust will take time to be rebuilt. The offending partner needs to comply with any request that is essential to build that trust back up. In Tiger’s case, he may need to fire his entourage and accept people his wife, Elin, hires and who report directly to her. They will be required to report often about all of Tiger’s activities while he is one the road. He probably won’t like it, but that is what it will take to save his marriage.

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